Katie, Tim & Cale Nester...

...would love it if you would follow along as we record our adoption journey. We are so excited to see and get to know the child that God has for us in Ethiopia!

To sidestep any confusion you may have upon reading our blog, here are a few international adoption words and their meanings:

Dossier - The collection of all our paperwork that is sent to Ethiopia. It's pretty much everything about us and our life written on paper, authenticated, and notarized. (pronounced: dos-ee-ay)
Referral - When our agency matches us with a baby according to our preferences! They will contact us with the info and a picture of the baby who will soon become a Nester!

other fun facts:
- We have requested an infant boy or girl, 0-18 months old.
- If you put down 'either' gender, there is a 98% chance of getting a referral for a boy.
- The average wait for a referral, once your dossier is sent to Ethiopia is about 7-9 months.
- After accepting a referral, you are issued a court date.
- Once you pass your court date, you are given an Embassy date, which you plan your travel time around.
- When our baby is home, we will re-adopt him in the states.
- We will incorporate the name Jace into his name somehow. We are unsure if we will use it as his first name or his middle name...but we know it'll be somehow paired up with his Ethiopian name.

Waiting part 3 - THE BEST PART!

Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers

Cale's ticker

Lilypie Third Birthday tickers

The Nesters

Monday, November 9, 2009

WE ACCEPTED!


I feel like each day gets BETTER! I love watching my ticker count up from the days we first saw his face, because it actually is counting DOWN the days until we can get him! Tim feels like the wait on his side is harder. Hm. Not me. I'm elated!
Today I met with an International Doctor to discuss Megersa's file and well...the long and the short of it is: it's a go! As with any international adoption there are always going to be some unanswered questions, but with what we know, he looks great. And that the things we are concerned about now, will most likely not be an in issue in time. Isn't that wonderful! Please continue to pray for his health.
God is soooo good and I know He's watching over my baby!

So for those of you who really appreciate how the "process works" (for me anyway), I will let you know what happens after you accept your referral:
I called and ________ answered. I told her who I was and that we were ready to accept Megersa's file! She sounded very excited (as if I just gave birth, lol!).
Before I even had to ask, she told me what to expect in the days/weeks/months ahead.
We will be getting the placement agreement via snail mail, to sign and return to AAI. They will simultaneously notify the staff in ET that we accept!!!!!
The staff in ET will prepare to merge our file with Megersa's! YEAH!!
(Hearing this was all so beautiful to me! It's like at 1:30pm on Monday, Nov 9, Megersa and I became a family (and of course, Tim and Cale too ;).
Okay, moment over. If I continue to type about the change that has happened in this baby's life in the past month, I will cry.
SO.....moving on.
_______ told me that Megersa's intake day was Sept 24, so he won't be eligible for court filing until November 24. That might sound bad, but I was originally told he came into care Oct 5, so we had our sights set on Dec 5.
Those few days can make a difference!
After he's eligible, she mentioned it'd be another 1-2 weeks till he's filed. I don't know if that means the court letter that everyone talks about, or something different, but either way, she said it should be the 1st or 2nd week of December when his case is filed?? (I think that's what I understood.)
I'm going to try to see if I can get that clarified.
Projected timeline from now:
Nov 24, eligible.
1st-2nd week December, filed.
From filing to court date, about 2-6 weeks.
From court date to travel, now about 6 weeks.
If we pass court, we will get scheduled for an Embassy Interview.
AAI's meetings are scheduled on Wednesdays...every other Wednesday.
And we will need to be in Ethiopia that week from Monday to Friday, as is required if we decide to travel (vs escort...which we will).

What else? Oh...I was told I would get instructions on putting together a welcome bag for Megersa (which I have already started!!!)...and that I should send it back to AAI and the next traveling staff member will take it over and take some pics of Megersa in his outfit!
I CAN'T WAIT!
I've been told that one of the staff members is coming back from ET as an escort for a baby girl soon, and should return to ET before Thanksgiving....so I need to put this bag together quickly and send it out asap!

Sunday, November 8, 2009

do you see what i see?

My baby boy is 2 months old.
It's been 2 years and 5 months since I had a 2 month old at home.
I kinda forget what they look like.
The pictures I have of Megersa are very 'up-close and personal'...which have been so helpful in memorizing his little face, but I really want a "body shot."
Because the pictures of him are just of his chest and face, he doesn't look that small, but yesterday I got re-aquainted with the size of 2 month old babies.
I went to a baby shower and one of the guests had a baby there...a 2 month old baby.
Then, I went to the store and the family in front of me at the checkout line had a baby boy in a stroller. I HAD to ask how old he was. I got the feeling, and I was right. "2 months old"
It's like when I was pregnant:
My eye was drawn to other pregnant ladies. I saw them EVERYWHERE!

2 months old is so tiny. 9.4 lbs is so LIGHT!
At the store I went looking through the baby clothes picking out things I thought would look cute on Megersa...then I'd look at the size...and notice it was '12 months' or '18 months'! I thought, MAN, I use to be so good at guessing!
So, I decided to deliberately look at the sizes and found something that was for an 8-12 lb baby. Sized, 0-3 months.
AWE! Sooooooooooo tiny!

Megersa, will you just stay 2 months old and 9.4lbs until Mommy can come get you? :)

((And just because I can't post a picture of my 2 month old baby boy, I'll post a picture of a 2 month old kitty! Look at his size compared to the orange! AWE!!!))

Saturday, November 7, 2009

"The Call"


How did it happen? When did it happen? Where did it happen?
Those questions and more will all be answered! I'll tell you the story:

ONCE UPON A TIME...
It was a sunny, November day...Thursday the 5th to be exact, at 1pm (11am Adoption Advocates time).
I had JUST walked upstairs after putting Cale down for a nap, and sat down on my favorite chair (the barstool at our kitchen countertop) to do some internet surfing while I ate lunch. Before I could even open up the computer, my phone rang.
Now let me tell you, NORMALLY before I even answer the phone, I can guess (pretty accurately I might say), who it is judging by what time of the day it is, or what day it is. But, this one took me by surprise. I figured it was Tim...but as my eyes gazed to my phone, I looked at the caller ID and saw that it was:
Adoption Advocates!!
My eyes BULGED - you know, like in the cartoons (ahhhooooga!) - and I picked it up.
"Hello?" I said timdily.
"Hello, is this Kathryn Nester?"
"Yes."
"This is __________ from Adoption Advocates, how are you doing?"
"Good, how are you?"
"Fine, thanks. I see that you liked to be called Katie?"
"Yes."
(At this point in time, I still cannot tell you why I was so timid when I continued to answer. Perhaps because I had been dreaming about that moment for so long, my brain was in shock and not giving my voice box the shrillness I figured would accompany such an event.) anyway...moving on.
"I have a few questions for you."
"Okay?"
Then she proceeded to ask me about my I600A and if I filed for it. Which I had. She told me that she wasn't seeing a copy of it, and it's important for the child's visa when they come home.
WHAT?? My brain was screaming!
I quickly pulled out my folder of files and grabbed the 171H (the paper you get after you are approved for the I600A) and asked if they wanted me to fax it over today, as I quietly hyperventilated.
"There's no rush...we just want to make sure families have this so there is no delay in bringing children home."
"Okay."
Really, at this point, I was having doubts that this was going to be "THE CALL" but thankfully, she continued to talk.
"I want to tell you about a baby boy!!"
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...was all I could think!
She continued to tell me about my little man, where he was from and his background story, and she read his file to me. I interrupted.
"What's his name?" (again, I was so shy, it still kinda boggles my mind - as if this is an inappropriate question)
"Megersa"
:)
As she read through the rest of the file, I scribbled as much information as I could down on a scrap piece of paper lying on my countertop. She was going too fast!
I asked her to repeat some things for me.
"It's all in the file, which we will send to you, if you're interested?"
YES, YES, YES!
I had a few questions for her (but of course, now I can think of a hundred different things I want to know) and she answered.
Then she told me that she specifically remembered my baby the last time she was in Ethiopia.
"I remember standing over his crib with ____, commenting on how we hadn't heard the name Megersa in awhile."
It woke me up from my shock. He's THERE! She's seen him!
He's a REAL PERSON, and someday soon...he'll be home.
THE WEIGHT WAS LIFTED!
She told me that they would send the file asap. Then we hung up.

I called Tim at work.
Casually, to throw him off, I said "hey babe, what's up?"
"Not much, why?"
(then I got hysterical - it finally kicked in!)
WE GOT THE CALL!
Tim now, was in disbelief.
"No we didn't!"
"YES....his name is Megersa and he's 2 months old.....(etc)"
Tim still didn't believe me...but I told him to get on my Gmail account because we would be getting his file in the next few minutes.
We waited.
IT WAS TORTURE!
I think both of us hit the 'refresh' button, oh, 1000 times!
It was probably only 10 minutes, but finally, we got the file...and we saw his face!
(I TRULY wish I could his picture, but we can't until we pass court and are legally his parents!! :)
I must say, he is simply adorable!
Really...I can't stop looking at him.
I carry his picture around all day. We only have 2 pics, and that will probably have to hold us over for another month and a half, because no one seems to be traveling in November. BOO! Thankfully one of the 2 pictures was from that day.

Nov 5...referral day.

Believe me though, he's beautiful, and, to quote my friend Rachael:
"He looks like a million bucks!"
He does. He's perfect.
Anyway, we spent the REST (literally...I was on the phone all day - Cale got pretty perturbed I wasn't playing with him) of the day calling people and sharing our good news!
I couldn't stop smiling! And I was actually smiling so hard for so long, I had to take advil! haha!
I'm just so happy. Everything is better now.
People ask me how much longer till we travel and we say "probably another 4-6 months." They are usually really upset for us...but I say, NO! We've been in the process for 1 year, and it has been an uphill climb. We kept ADDING days to our wait, but now we can SUBTRACT! Counting down is SOOOOOOOOO much better than counting up (unless it's money, haha!).
THE HARDEST PART IS OVER!
I know some people dont feel that way, they think the wait is much more brutal after referral, but I disagree. The fact that I have a name, and a face, and some stats about my son is truly a gift. I can breathe deeply again.
To top it all off (as if this isn't wonderful enough)...my Cale seems enamored with "Baby Brother."
Megersa's picture is on the background of my computer and Cale gets upset when it's blocked by an email or anything.
"I wanna see baby brother!" It's just so cute.
He's totally butchering the name Megersa, but, let's face it...it IS a tough one.
Yesterday he was playing with my cell phone (which has his picture on the screen) and he told me he wants "Baby Brother on Mommy's pone."
I'm not naive to think that it wont be an adjustment for Cale, but I really think that next year, they'll be inseparable!

We have an appointment with an International Doctor on Monday to look over Megersa's file and after that we'll "officially accept"!!!
I will of course, be posting again soon!
Thank you so much to all of you who have prayed for us over the past few months! I know God has been using your strength because mine was often failing. I feel renewed and I praise God for this miracle!
Please continue praying for Megersa's health...there are some issues to consider, but we are confident that it's nothing we can't handle (with God's help, of course!)

THE END.

Friday, November 6, 2009

DO WE HAVE GOOD NEWS?????
I think we might! ;)
I want to tell the story in full when we "officially" accept.

I will tell you that I am experiencing so much JOY that I think my heart might explode. The weight has been lifted!!!
Thank you Lord. You are so good to me, and I don't deserve it.

So, check back at the beginning of next week for the story!!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

analogies

Want to hear some adoption analogies I came up with?
#1 - ADOPTION IS LIKE:

A snail running a race.
Seriously...could you imagine suiting up...toeing the line with nervous excitement, taking off when the whistle blows, only to realize hours later (or months ;) that you're a SNAIL! You have put forth your best effort, and have been going strong for SO LONG, but, you're not getting anywhere! (or at least it seems that way!)
Being a snail at this point in time is not ideal...but you feel the compulsion to keep going. You're hoping to eventually get there!!!!

#2 - ADOPTION IS LIKE:

A rabbit that chases after the carrot strung in his face.
Again with the running. But, Paul exhorts us to "run the race with patience, the race that is set before us..." so the racing analogies are memorable, right? :)
Someone dangled this BEAUTIFUL carrot in front of the rabbit, and he wants it!
He has his eyes on the prize! I'm sure initially he thought if he kept his gaze focused enough, the frog would stop dangling the carrot, and eventually it would be his. Maybe he's losing confidence now? Maybe not. Each day brings a new set of emotions for him:
Determination to get the carrot.
Anxiety that the carrot may NEVER be his.
Hopefulness that if he continues strongly, he will be rewarded.
Hopelessness thinking this "experiment" will never end.
Sadness for the carrot, it WANTS to be his. :)
Patience to wait out the remainder of the race...........

#3 - Adoption causes a HEAVY heart.


It's so simple, but soooooo true. I feel like my chest is weighed down most of the time. When I pray, I really MEAN to pray about other things, but usually after a few minutes, I always always come back to my pleading prayer for this child.
The weight on my heart is astronomical. I need this burden lifted, soon, Lord!!
I think about this little boy CONSTANTLY. My mind teams up as I daydream of what it will be like to get "the call" and what it will be like to hold him for the first time....to introduce him to his brother, and show him off to friends and families...to feed him, and comfort him...(and the list goes on and on).
It's an INTENSE desire.

I bet I could think of many more. But I will stop with these 3.
You get the picture, right? :)
It will happen eventually.
I must BE STILL. Be still and know He is God.
My goal for these posts really are not to complain, but to show some true emotion as I take this journey. It is therapeutic, and I'm sure others can relate.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

8


Care to guess what this post is about?
Yep. I won a game of poker with this hand! Isn't that great? :)
NOT!! (by the way - I think we should bring "not" back!, haha)

We made it to the 8 month waiting mark...almost 12 months overall. It's getting very very hard. We're so close to the top (at number 2 on the list), but I can't get my hopes up, because we only moved up one spot in one month. We could get our referral in a few days, or it could be a few more months. There are no solids at this point. I dont have much else to say about it. I could tell you exactly what I found out at our check-in, but...I'm not even sure who reads this anymore. ANYWAY. Trick or treating was fun with Cale today. It was pretty chilly, so I dressed him in a long sleeved shirt and a fleece jacket underneath his spiderman costume...he looked a little bulky, though he didn't seem to mind. It reminds me though of Jerry Seinfeld's stand up rountine about Halloween though - it's hilarious! :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M523VCKvCVo

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

7 1/2+

Believe it or not, it's been over 7 1/2 months of us just WAITING. We're coming up on our year mark in about a month or so. After we announced we were adopting we've had friends tell us they were pregnant, and have had their babies already. It's just craziness. I was really feeling hopeful that October was our month, but now that we're hitting the halfway mark, I'm starting to lose that hope.
We've been told that there are MANY many toddlers waiting, but that doesn't really affect us, since they consider "toddlers" to be 2,3, and 4 year-olds.
We're planning to visit family for Thanksgiving and Christmas, and I just can't face another family function without any news of our baby! It's TORTURE! I soooo want to have good news to share!
Prayerfully, we will!

Countdown to Christmas. I asked Santa for my little chocolate man.

Our Agencies

Our Adoption Agency - Adoption Advocates International
www.adoptionadvocates.org
Our Home Study Agency - Illinois Christian Ministries
www.icmfamily.org